Ellen is making
dreams come true. On her website she asks, "Do you want Ellen to make your
dreams come true?" Yes, I do have a
dream. It is not to go on a tropical
vacation, nor a chance to win cash or a chance to meet my favorite celebrity.
My dream requires no
more than a stage, with ears willing to hear my story of survival.
My story is one of
being relentlessly bullied throughout my high school years.
The reason I want to
share my story is because I know intimately of the consequences to the victim
when bullying gets out of control. When bullying gets out of control, victims
can find themselves ostracized from an entire school.
When this happens a
pecking order arises where others humiliate the victim to quickly and firmly
establish their own social status. Bystanders, and bullies alike cease to have
empathy for the victim as they become targets for public shaming, and ridicule.
The victim is no longer perceived as a human being deserving of respect.
As a result they
become threatened on a daily basis. I was told multiple times that I should
seriously consider suicide because no one likes me.
Many of those who
endure this degree of hatred fail their education, and become high school
drop-outs because they simply cannot endure yet another day of abuse.
The psychological
stress and impact of being bullied is devastating. Especially in a time when the
adolescent brain is undergoing critical psychological
and neurological development. And that
person is beginning to define a concept of self and their role in society.
Because victims of
severe bullying lose out on forming meaningful, and purposeful relationships -
they become emotionally stunted in their development as adults. Often they are
prone to developing crippling mental health issues like social anxiety, chronic
depression, and even post traumatic Stress Disorder.
I know because this
is my story. My experiences of being bullied had led me to 5 suicide attempts
after dropping out of high school, and a string of dysfunctional relationships
because of my low self-esteem. Now I live on disability for chronic depression,
social anxiety, and panic attacks.
My story illustrates
the lifelong damage that can result from being bullied, and just how
destructive that damage is.
However, I can also speak on the strengths that I found
in my adversities. Strengths that led me to become a" Guinness World
Record" holder as well as a" Ripley's Believe It or Not" record
holder, among other notable achievements like being in a nationwide article,
and being published in 2 books.
I also found purpose
in being an advocate for mental health issues, and anti-bullying.
I can also speak on what I think needs to be
done to help resolve the bullying issue.
I think schools
should be held accountable for implementing, and maintaining a strict no
bullying atmosphere. There is an answer to the bullying problem, but it
requires a network of school authorities sharing their strategies and successes
to the bullying problem and implementing an anti-bullying curriculum.
A curriculum that
teaches that content of character and moral aptitude are just as critical as
academic success.
There needs to be
discussion among school trustees, principles, teachers, and in the classroom
addressing the bullying issue. Discussions also need to take place when
conflict occurs, discussions that include the bullied, the bully, and the
bystander.
Every issue starts
with awareness, then debate. And
eventually collaborative efforts to resolve the issue. Evil happens when good
people do nothing. We need to be part of the solution, not part of the problem.
It is my dream to
present a speech on the Ellen DeGeneres show detailing everything I have spoken
about. Because I want that one moment in my life where I can use what I have
learned and experienced, to positively affect as many lives as possible.
I have written
blogs, and made YouTube videos on the subject -with little attention. I have
even shared my material with every school, school principle, and school trustee
in my city with little effect. I have even approached schools with speeches I
have written but was declined. Some schools simply told me they didn't have a
bullying problem even though I knew otherwise. Others simply did not offer to
work with me to create a mutually beneficial speech.
I believe I went
through this life experience for a reason. It is my experience ,as a victim of
bullying, that qualifies me to speak on the subject. My asset is my willingness
to speak about my pains, and struggle. And my story provides its own new and
unique insights to the bullying issue.
I want the
satisfaction and sense of purpose that comes with knowing I did something that
benefited the lives of others on a larger scale.
The opportunity to
make a difference in the lives of so many people is one thing that would
fulfill my attempt of self-reward. I would feel great if I could help others.